B-Bounce Back When Knocked Down – ABCs of How to Take Care of Yourself

I dragged myself out of bed and went into the bathroom where I splashed some cold water on my face. My bloodshot eyes stared back at me with a look of despair. My late husband, Bill, had been to yet another doctor who could not tell us definitively why he was so exhausted and shy the muscles in his stomach kept losing their elasticity even though he as exercising regularly. I was discouraged and scared.

Have you ever felt like you were knocked down by worries and concern for the health of someone you love? That was a constant for me as I struggled with Bill to go see the doctor. One doctor even said that he thought it was psychosomatic. Really?!?!?

Day after day of this stress with the added responsibilities of caring for my mother-in-love who lived with us, coping with a rebellious teenager, multiple responsibilities as a pastor’s wife and a full-time job I hated left me exhausted. I decided to go to the doctor.

“Mrs. Sebastian, we are going to have run some more tests but with the symptoms you are describing I suspect that you have lupus?

My heart sank. A lady in our church had died of lupus. I knew it was a serious auto-immune disease. I didn’t hear anything else the doctor told me that day. I made it back to my car and sat there trying to absorb the impact of this news on my already full platter as a caregiver. I lay my head on the steering wheel and cried. I tried to pray but all I could say was, “Jesus, why?”

I felt overwhelmed and defeated. This was the final blow that would wipe us out. What would happen if I couldn’t take care of everyone?

The tears overwhelmed me so much that I had to pull the car to the shoulder. I got out of my car and looked up to the sky. It was a dark cloudy day that matched my mood. Suddenly, a shaft of light burst through one of the fast-moving clouds. Then other rays found an opening and shot down toward me. It seemed like it was placed there just for me. I began to feel hope.

I got in my car and drove the rest of the way home with a new resolve in my heart to regain my hope no matter what anyone else did. I would be the most positive person in any room I entered. I would believe that God had a plan for all of this mess. I could not see it now as the clouds threatened to cut off the very light of our future. Still, I could trust in the God of HOPE!

Resilience is the quality some people seem to possess that when they get knocked down they bounce back stronger than ever. They always find a way to rise from the ashes and the struggles of life. It was up to me to change my course and I did. That day I went from a victim to a victor. I chose a positive attitude every day. It was difficult as my joints ached and my face looked like it had the imprint of a butterfly. I felt like a failure with my daughter then decided to write a book about it. I chose optimism and to look at the positive side of the situation with my husband’s health when he was diagnosed with a form of Muscular Dystrophy. And the situation with my mother-in-love … well, that taught me to laugh at myself. (More on that one later.)

Stop calling yourself “stupid” (or your version of putting yourself down) You are resilient when you choose to hang on to hope. Start calling yourself “The Bounce Back Kid.”

There is a beautiful treasure inside you that others need to see. We were pastors of a small church and I did not want to work full time. I wanted to be ‘in the ministry.’ Yet, God had placed me in a rich mission field. I was fighting my placement and did not realize until later what He was doing. A few years later when the company was sold and I was laid off, many approached me and told me what a difference my life message had made as they saw peace and hope even in the difficult times I was facing. They saw the glow of hope through the cracks. They could see that that power was coming from God and not from me. So relax and enjoy the ride.

Take advantage of every opportunity to share the hope that is within you — even through the cracks.

Thank You, Lord, for the opportunity to allow You to be strong where I am weak. I am so tired and discouraged right now with all that I have to do. I just don’t know if I can go on yet I know that you have a plan and it’s a good one. I thank you that You are creating a treasure inside me so that Your power can be seen even in my weakness. I feel so defective – chipped and cracked – right now yet I will trust that your power will shine through it all. I trust that when You declare that I will not be crushed that I will bounce back stronger with increased hope. I must admit I am bewildered at time but I will not give in to despair. You will not abandon us. And, when I am knocked down I will not be destroyed. I will bounce back with hope.

In Jesus’ name.

Amen