Believing in Healing (Part 2)

Two and half years after God healed my husband’s breathing issues and allowed him to go home from the hospital we were back at the office of the pulmonologist who had become his doctor. The muscles had continued to weaken and the diaphragm in particular had stopped working completely. Without this function working, Bill was dependent on a ventilator for his next breath.

Through it all, his faith was strong and his confidence that God was his healer never wavered. I don’t know how this works except I saw this miracle transpire every day. I would go in to help him out of bed and before he got up he would point to his legs. I knew that meant that we were to pray for healing. For each day, he received strength and grace. He managed to get up, go to the bathroom, ride his scooter to the living room where he camped out the rest of the day. I worked from my home office and checked on him regularly.

He loved to listen to praise music and his favorite song was, “This is the air I breathe.” As soon as I would hear that song, I would run to his chair and grab his hand as we praised together. We were grateful for every breath. Most of us take so much for granted. My gratitude for basic body functions grew exponentially. It became harder and harder to get him to the doctor appointments. I began to check in to getting a van where we could more easily get him in and out.

Our family gathered often around Bill’s chair. We created events such as Western nights in order to honor his love for the old westerns. We created priceless memories in this season that we realized was a reprieve. The ongoing miracle was that despite having the grandkids around him he did not get sick. He didn’t even get a cold during this whole season. Here’s a slide show of the Western night.

Bill’s last doctor’s appointment stands out like none other. The pulmonologist urged him to get a tracheotomy as he was not getting enough oxygen through the mask. We had tried a variety of masks. Bill had his white board there and wrote a huge NO! followed by a small thank you at the bottom of the message.

As we rode home in the car I started nagging him about why he was refusing what could be a life extension. His white board was in the back so he signed what I thought was, “I’m H-E-L-D.”

When we got him settled again in his chair I asked him to explain again why he was not agreeing to get the tracheotomy. He took the white board and wrote, “I’m H-E-A-L-E-D!”

The last time Bill had felt like this God had healed him. I gave him a big hug and he hugged me back. I left a few days later for another state to do some training. I had not left him for many months yet we needed the income. Our kids agreed to care for him. While I was there I got “the call” that changed my life forever. My daughter called me to tell me that Bill had died during the night. (For all the details, you may read The Power of Hope in Mourning: Ride the Waves to Comfort.)

It was a crazy experience driving the distance to the airport and making the last flight out of the day. Miracles abounded that day. As I settled into my seat on the plane next to the window I let myself feel the sadness. In my mind’s eye I was able to see the true healing. Bill was running around Heaven on strong legs, raising his hands to worship his Savior, singing to the top of his lungs, breathing in the breath of Heaven. He was indeed H-E-A-L-E-D!

Hope Tools

Look for the blessings

Things don’t always go the way we want them to go. I wish I could have continued to care for my precious husband. I am grateful for every day of life we shared and look forward to seeing him again in Heaven. God gave us a gift of two and half more years together. We were blessed because we knew to take advantage of the time that we had. We created precious memories. Not everyone get that privilege.

Bless

Blessings are a matter of perspective. Blessings are a choice. Sometimes it takes everything in me to declare blessings in the middle of the trials. I could choose to be bitter that the second healing took my husband from us or I can bless the Lord, with everything in me, for all His compassion, goodness and mercy toward us. Only He knew what my husband was going through. My part is to trust and bless His name. Some times the blessings come with tears and comfort flows.

Prayer

Lord, I praise you that we can express our praise and gratitude to you from every part of our being. You are so awesome and wonderful in our lives. Thank you for reminding me of all the good You have done. For starters, you forgive and release me from all condemnation because of what Jesus did on the cross. On top of that, you heal all my dis-ease. This means that You give me peace in every circumstance. You deliver me from death itself by promising to bring me live eternal in Your presence because of your unfailing love and compassion. When it feels like I am drying up inside You fill me with good and beautiful things. I will be satisfied as long as I live. I am strong like an eagle and my youth is restored. I praise you with everything in me for these benefits and blessings. In Jesus’ name. Amen.