C-Celebrate Everything

During the last year and half of my late husband’s life, I had a morning routine. I would tiptoe into his bedroom to check on him.

I stood willing him to move a finger or something to show me that he was still with us. The rhythmic sound of the ventilator that was doing the breathing for him due to the paralysis of his diaphragm from muscular dystrophy rang in my ears.

Just as I would feel fear grip my heart, his right pinkie would move slightly. I would sigh in relief and proceed to wake him up.

One of the greatest joys that still lasts from the days when I cared for my late husband, Bill, was the way we celebrated life as a family. I determined that we would live with no regrets. That took many forms. The kids and grandkids gathered at our home to celebrate.

Years before, we had started taking pictures sitting on the hearth of the fireplace in the den. We celebrated simply but consistently. We gathered at our home for every holiday and every birthday. Bill was an avid collector of all things western so we had a western night.

When the body fails, you learn to celebrate all the small victories such as being able to get up for the day and making it to your lift chair in the den. It’s like the distillation of what really matters goes into effect and you find joy where you can find it.

Take advantage of every opportunity to celebrate. Take the trips that you’ve put off taking. Say the words that need to be said. As you spend so much of your time taking care of others do not lose the opportunities that you have. On the whole, I do not have a lot of regrets other than not taking vacations with my husband as we cared for his mother. We always thought that we would have ‘our time.’ It never came.

Hope Tip: Schedule a few hours where you can do something you like to do. It may be to go get a cup of coffee by yourself or a walk in the part.

What went well this week? Celebrate every victory by acknowledging it. It really doesn’t matter how small the win may seem to someone else, you can still celebrate it. Set up your celebration calendar. Look up the crazy national days and celebrate them as well. For example: October 1st is National Homemade Cookies Day. Celebrate by making your favorite homemade cookie. Well, you get the idea.

Hope Tip: Start small with one celebration a month. What are you going to celebrate?

Even when Bill could no longer eat because he lost his ability to swallow we would talk about what his ‘meal’ was that day. It was usually meatloaf and mashed ‘taters.’ To this day, we still celebrate birthdays with the celebrant’s favorite food and dessert. We celebrate his earthy birthday with tacos because that was the last meal that he ate before having the feeding tube. What is your favorite food?

Hope Tip: Make a list of favorite food and recipes. What’s the most decadent? What’s the healthiest?

Thank You, Lord, that I can choose to celebrate today (Nehemiah 8:12 Voice). Thank You for the race that I get to run in caring for those I love. It can seem hard and that I will never reach the end of the race. I thank You for calling me and equipping me to celebrate today the victory that I look forwards to obtaining. I thank You for the joy that is before us while we run the race and the Heavenly prize that awaits us. (Philippians 3:14 NIV)

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

For the rest of the alphabet in the ABCs of Self Nurture for Caregivers please click here.