Pay attention. Listen well! Isaiah 17:28 Voice
A few years ago when my kids were little I had a very hectic schedule. Between pastoring a church alongside my husband, I worked a full-time job.The rush to get homework done, dinner on the table and kids ready for bed was usually a blur. One such evening stands out in my mind. I was at the kitchen sink washing the dishes when I felt a tug on my pant leg. I looked down and saw my son sitting on the floor looking up at me.
“Listen, Mommy,” he said.
“Okay sweetheart. Mommy is listening,” I said impatiently.
“No, Mommy, I mean really listen,” was his reply.
He did this several more times until finally he said something that caught my attention.
“Mommy, listen with your eyes.”
It is easy to get so busy that we stop truly listening to the most important ones in our lives. Listening is an action not an afterthought. With all of our electronic devices it can be harder than ever to truly focus on what others are saying. You need to look at them to observe their body language and validate them.
How do you increase the listening factor in your family gatherings?
Create a signal
In our household, the signal that you need to be heard is pulling on your right ear. It’s the same movement as when you play ‘charades’. You will usually have the other person say, “Sounds like…” The response can be “…that I need someone to be a sounding board.” It may take a few times but they will get it.
Active Expressions of Love and Honor:
- Have a family meeting to discuss the issue
- Follow-up consistently
- Make an effort to listen carefully when those you love are speaking
Use a cell phone basket
Last Christmas dinner I put a cute bow on a basket. I put my phone in it and passed it around. I didn’t have to make a huge speech. I simply let the kids know that they could get their cell phones back once the meal and presents were over. It worked! In fact, the teenagers were policing their parents on the use of cell phones at the table.
Active Expressions of Love and Honor:
- Decide in your family meeting what are the boundaries for being on your devices
- Enforce it lovingly
- Spend time in conversations
- Look beyond the words to what is going on in the background
Prayer
Forgive me, Lord, for my self-absorption and concern for the wrong things. I appreciate the reminder that these little ones will soon be grown and will not need me to listen. In fact, allow me to teach them well so that when it’s my turn to want a listening ear they will put their electronic devices down and ‘listen with their eyes’. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
Click here to read the rest of the #Write28Days series.
Author, speaker, corporate trainer, ordained minister and Hope Catalyst, Karen Sebastian enjoys sharing her rich life experiences with others – engaging them in adventurous discoveries of the beauty of hope in a dark, cloudy world. Her books will inspire you to embrace hope no matter what you are going through. As a caregiver and widow she took brave steps forward to fulfill God’s calling on her life. She has now remarried and enjoys her new hubby and spending time with their children and grandchildren. To increase hope and improve relationships with yourself and those that you love, check out her Facebook page – The Power of Hope.
