The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 ESV
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The events that create grief can isolate. The shock hits you and you need to sit down to process. You need to be alone to take it in. That’s how I felt when I got the call that my first husband, Bill, had died during the night due to breathing complications of Muscular Dystrophy. It was e unexpected nature of the event that, to this day, can take my breath away as I work to recall the details. Certain ones stand out and are indelibly engraved in my memory. Others, are a blur.
Bottom line – all of us have lost something in life – a fight, a game, a job, a marriage, a loved one to death, etc. Take your pick. We are all united in this experience. Then why – oh tell me why – do we feel that we are the only one who has experienced this level of grief.
If someone you love is experiencing grief leave them alone yet stay NEAR. They may try to push you away in the anger felt for the injustice of the loss. Stay anyway.
That is a fine line to walk – leave them alone yet stay NEAR. Don’t hover yet don’t abandon. Lay down your own feelings at this time and focus on the one who is hurting.
When they are ready to talk they will. When they are ready to say that they are ‘glad he/she is in a better place’ they will say it. And you will hear it because you are NEAR.
Stop trying to shelter them from the tears. Instead, cry with them. That’s what Jesus did.
NEAR means that you trust God is working and is closer than you could ever think of being. In fact, I can say that during my deepest nights of grief I felt the nearness of God in unmistakable ways.
NEAR means that you are ready to drop everything and go shopping, meet for coffee, etc. when they are ready (and not one second before.)
NEAR means that you know your relationship is strong enough to be the surf board to carry both of you as you ride the waves of sorrow to the shore. Jesus is there making breakfast for you just like He did for Peter.
You can count on it.
STOP!
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Author, speaker, corporate trainer, ordained minister and Hope Catalyst, Karen Sebastian enjoys sharing her rich life experiences with others – engaging them in adventurous discoveries of the beauty of hope in a dark, cloudy world. Her books will inspire you to embrace hope no matter what you are going through. To increase hope and improve relationships with yourself and those that you love, sign up to receive Karen’s emails.
