Be fully prepared to hold your ground. Ephesians 6:13 Voice
I sat listening to my friend talk about her caregiving situation with her mother-in-law.
“I need to share with you what is going on with my mother-in-law right now,” she started hesitantly.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“I just don’t think I can take it any more. Nothing I ever do is good enough. She won’t eat and so I spend what seems like hours cajoling her to take a few bites of food,” she continued.
With each word, her bodily position seemed to droop more and more. Finally, she slumped in the chair and began to weep. I let her cry as I prayed for wisdom to know how to help her. I remembered that feeling of defeat and loss in the midst of what felt like certain defeat. There seemed to be no way out of this one.
She finally stopped crying and said, “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel so selfish.”
I reached over and hugged her. She seemed to relax for a moment and then I felt her stiffen.
“I want you to start making a small change that is going to transform your approach to your situation,” I told her confidently.
“At this point, I’ll try anything you suggest,” she replied.
“Ok, here goes…. Stand with me.”
As we both stood up, her head continued to droop. I reached over and gently lifted her chin.
“It’s vital that you realize that your bodily posture affects how you feel. I want you to stand comfortably with your legs shoulder width apart. Raise you head with a long, tall neck. How do you feel so far?” I asked.
“Strangely, I’m starting to feel more in control,” she replied.
“Now, place both hands on your hips,” I instructed her.
“Like Wonder Woman?” she asked with a smile.
“Yes! This is your Power Posture stance,” I acknowledged. “Set your timer and do this for two minutes every day. It doesn’t have to be all at the same time. If you only have a few seconds then stand like this for at least 30 seconds at a time.”
Active Self Nurture
Prepare your body
There is a definite connection between your posture and what is happening inside your brain. This might be a ‘cart and horse’ analogy. Do you stand straight because you feel powerful or do you feel powerful because you stand up straight? The answer: Yes. Research is showing that holding the power posture stance for 2 minutes a day actually releases the assertiveness hormone (testosterone) and lowers the stress hormone (cortisol). Take this posture even when you don’t feel like it and soon your ‘feel-good’ hormones will catch up with the choice you have made.
Practice daily
Every time you feel yourself shrinking from the task at hand remember that you are in a war. Take your battle stance. You are a power warrior and the details are already taken care of so that in the end YOU win. This means that you instead of groveling and feeling less than your potential, you say, “With the help of the Lord, we’ve got this one too.” This will take practice if you’ve been indulging in complaints and ‘wormy’ conversations. (Wormy conversations are when you take the stance of the proud worm so that others will say how awesome you are!)
Pray and believe for victory
The stance of someone who wins the race is very different from the one who is happy just to make it to the end. You are victorious. You are a winner. Throw your hands in the air as praise God before you cross the finish line. Lift up your head to your maker and creator and thank Him for how he has all the details taken care of. Move like a champion not a defeated victim. Prayer will accomplish this in you as you begin to take the territory that is rightfully yours.
Prayer
Thank You, Lord, for your help and presence when I feel that this caregiving situation is more than I can handle. I need Your help so that I’ll still be on my feet when it’s all over but the shouting. I apply Your truth, righteousness, peace, faith and salvation to this situation. Thank You, also, for the privilege of praying even with my eyes wide open. I pray for all caregivers to realize the strength they possess and that we need each other in case one falls behind or someone is tempted to drop out (Ephesians 6:13-18 MSG).
In Jesus’ name. Amen.
